Survivor

Survivor

A #SurvivorStory by Sandra

I grew up in a small town on the east coast in an abusive low income family. I remember times when we had no heat or hot water. My mother’s abuse was physical and verbal.. My father’s abuse was sexual. My earliest memories of being exposed to sex were at the age of 4 or 5. I thought it was normal to watch pornography and let him take pictures of me…every girl experienced daddy’s special attention right? . I always felt dirty and thought there was something wrong with me for feeling that way. My grandfather and one of my uncles began abusing me a few years later. When I was 13 my father raped me. I lost my innocence to the man that was supposed to protect me. That was the last time he touched me. Then came the verbal and physical abuse.. perhaps because he was angry at himself I will never know as he died when I was 18. I know my mother in her valium induced state chose to ignore what was happening to me and our relationship today is strained. My father took my virginity and for that I am still angry..though I’m trying to let go of my anger and forgive him.

I am now 49, a recovering alcoholic with a wonderful family and I feel truly blessed that I survived

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